bittersweet but mostly bitter

Just yesterday I found out that my best friend is moving to Washington. The worse thing it that she left this morning and I didn't even get a chance to say bye.

You may remember this friend. ^ She's ^ the gal I mentioned previously about ending our relationship. I suppose things worked itself out and bam! Here we are closer than ever. Not literally though because she is nearly 2,000 miles away from me. Breaks my heart. Good news though: She will be coming home for prom night! How magical. :) 
I know that her moving to Washington is a good thing for her. And even for us. Distance makes the heart grow fonder. So, the next time I see her I'll hug her and give her a little slapping because she didn't even tell me that she was moving before-hand :P

only shooting stars break the mold!

Ah, yet another day in typical arctic Alaska. You know, just normal blizzards with 30 mph winds and .8 mile visibility. The plus side of having a blizzard: the results i.e., exceptionally warm temperatures and tons of snow! Although I've never been good at digging tunnels and perfecting them into mini-houses like my brothers, I still look forward to it every year. Kinda like the kid who joins basketball every year knowing he'll be on JV for the whole season or the girl who runs the race and dreams of winning but is plenty satisfied with just actually finishing the race. I dream of someday building a tunnel that will go beyond anybody's wildest-tunnel dreams! 
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Today I learned an amazing yet very puzzling and quite sorrowful concept. In chapter 25 of "The Grapes of Wrath" by John Steinbeck, Steinbeck describes the amazing ability and knowledge that humans posses that can do amazing things like grafting apple trees with a pear branch. However, those same humans posses the coldness and heartlessness to destroy the fruit that blossoms from the trees right in front of the starving people who traveled miles in hopes of getting food. It truly breaks my heart. 
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I must say, I wasn't as disappointed with Valentines Day this year as I had anticipated. My physics class has a pet spider who, although he didn't have a choice, was my valentine. I knew what I was getting myself into, you know, giving up getting chocolates or a kiss and other valentines related things, but I was happy. Sammy the spider did not disappoint me because I didn't have any expectations in the first place :) 
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random fact: Will Ferrell= one of the greatest actors. End of story.
Notice how I put fact and not opinion. That's right.

Psalm 18:1

I love you, O LORD, my strength. 

God bless my great uncle Ray and his family.

<3

So, tomorrow is Valentines Day. I don't mean to sound cliche or anything, but boo for not having a Valentines. I was going to ask this kid just because he is really adorable, but I chickened out. I suppose I should blame myself for my dreadful fate of spending my Valentines with my physics and algebra book. 

On the plus side, today was a fairly great day. My brother loves me and decided to show it by giving me this desk that he had made. Very nifty if I do say so myself. 

My brother is one of the most crafty kids I know. I hope he pursues his ambitions to become a welder and back-up dancer for Justin Bieber. Totally kidding about the second part, but wouldn't that be neat? Another great thing about today, the weather is warming up. It's a comfortable -11 but it feels like a joyful -39. Oh, how I love the arctic weather. I'm in serious need of sleep. Gotta be rested for a long day of reading facebook posts all about how much people love each other and making me feel like a loner. Oh, one last thing, another life goal is to never become the lonely, crazy cat lady and by the way things are going, lets not hold our breath.

welcome to my world.

I won't start of with telling you about my day. I'll start of with telling you about my year so far so you can relate a little easier and understand why I describe my days to follow the way I do. 2011, a year away from 2012. The world might as well end in 2011 instead of waiting until 2012. I guess my past years haven't been too great, but at the same time I shouldn't be complaining. It took me 16 years to realize how greatly I take things for granted. For instance, my best friend Kaylan, or should I say ex-best friend. When I look back upon our friendship I can't help but feel like it was all my fault that our friendship ended. On the plus side, we ended our friendship on good terms. We are more tolerant of each other. My year has been decent other than the fall out of my best friend. I have been feeling more ambitious than usual. I make huge plans in my head like to travel to Nice or Cannes, become a NCA Champion, direct/edit/produce the next blockbuster. Its a little hard to handle all these ambitions and dreams that run through my mind. Which brings me to my next subject, my sanity. Oh, is it difficult keeping track of mr. sanity, he just seems to roam all over with out warning and sometimes isn't reliable. I suppose that's why I decided to blog my thoughts. It gives me a hard piece of evidence that sometimes I can compose myself long enough to scribble some words down. I tend to channel my craziness through my imagination. You see, mr. sanity is pretty much married to mrs. imagination. They come hand in hand. If I can't use my imagination while doing assignments and tasks then there goes my sanity right out the window. I think that one of my goals in life is to some day learn to control my sanity and imagination and use it to my advantage. 
The last thing you should know about me in order to better understand my blog posts is that I am unpredictable and random. Today I'll blog a 20 page autobiography and tomorrow I'll blog a joke I heard on tv. Unpredictability/ randomness, another thing I need to learn to control.